On day one of my blog I thought, I should finally be able to do this in writing. After all it’s been 20 years since Tasha asked me to educate others on the subject of organ and tissue donation. And on May 7th of 2013 it will be 20 years since she became an organ and tissue donor. And after all, I’ve done so many presentations over these past years and I’ve spoken of this so often with others, so putting things in writing shouldn’t be too difficult.
The day after I post my blog, I begin to struggle with my feelings, feelings of loss and pain, feelings that I have been running away from ever since Tasha died all those years ago. With all of this I quickly realize that this is going to be way more difficult than I thought. But I know that I must go on because by doing so, maybe just maybe, I will finally be able to let go of the pain.
I have always dreaded shedding tears over the pain of my loss, our loss, and this dread came from believing that if I started to cry, that my tears would never stop. But, I know that, yes at times my heart will break again, but I will be able to collect myself and my thoughts and I will be able to move on. I know that, Tasha, wanted me to help others but she would also want me to move on.
So now I will move on and I will try to tell you the story, Tasha’s story, my story, our story. Hopefully as I do so, I pray that, these words that I write will help to bring others comfort peace and hope.
Best wishes
Maria
Keep on writing, Maria. Get it out. It's okay to cry and be sad sometimes. We're here for you!
ReplyDelete